Our List of 40 Eating Disorder Recovery Tips for Tough Days
By Britt Berg, M.S.
Clinically reviewed by Maggie Moore
Recovering from an eating disorder like anorexia, bulimia, ARFID and binge eating disorder is hard. It's important to remember that the discomfort you are experiencing now is temporary. If you are struggling right now, please remind yourself: “This too shall pass.”
Over time, the pain and discomfort you are experiencing right now will lessen and will be easier to manage. One day, the challenges you face now won’t look so impossible. Through it all, we hope to help you cope with the daily challenges in recovery with these 40 eating disorder recovery tips.
Tips to help you choose recovery every single day
- Feel like giving up? Every day, you get to make a choice. It’s up to you to choose recovery.
- Eating disorder recovery does not happen in a straight line. There will be ups and downs. On the good days and on the bad days, you are still making progress — as long as you continue to choose recovery.
- Remind yourself why you chose recovery. What led you to treatment in the first place? When you feel like giving up, write out a list of your values and your desires for your future — and let those guide you in taking the next best step for you.
- It’s okay to have difficult and painful thoughts, feelings and emotions in recovery. It’s okay to struggle. You may not know how you are going to get through this, but you will.
Tips for nutrition support
- Eating disorders aren't just about food — and you can't recover from an eating disorder without food. In recovery, food is your medicine. Without it, your brain and body cannot heal from the damage the eating disorder has caused.
- You deserve to have a peaceful relationship with food and your body. Remember that all foods fit in recovery.
- Mealtime can be difficult and you may be challenged. By approaching food in a balanced way, you can move forwards towards a lasting recovery. Reach out to your treatment team if you need help with meal planning.
- Remember that nutrition can resolve many physical and mental health consequences the eating disorder has caused. Nutrition can help with:
- Hormone balance
- Improving bone health
- Increasing energy
- Stabilizing moods (reducing depression, anxiety, irritability)
- Improving hair and skin health
- Our goal is to provide you with the resources you need to support your nutrition in recovery.
Tips to support eating disorder relapse
- Fact: you are going to be triggered in recovery. Stress is going to happen and it may happen a lot. You may be tempted to numb uncomfortable feelings by binge eating, purging, or using drugs or alcohol. However, it is extremely valuable to be able to feel your feelings without numbing them, without putting any barriers between you and your feelings. Reach out to your treatment team if this is hard for you.
- It’s common to experience shame in recovery when you slip into eating disorder thoughts and behaviors. Even in these moments, you have a choice to continue to choose recovery. If you are having urges that might lead you back into anorexia or bulimia relapse, try these steps.
- Stop and notice how you are feeling.
- Ask yourself: what is going on? Are you stressed? Have you gone through a major life change?
- Breathe and remind yourself that you have a choice in this moment.
- If you are feeling shame, call shame by its name. And let it go.
- If you do relapse, please know that you haven’t ruined everything. Be gentle with yourself. Relapse can offer us a teaching moment to become more deeply in tune with ourselves. If you fall, just get up, brush yourself off and keep moving forward in recovery.
- Life will throw you off balance. Illness, stress, and daily life changes can affect your hunger and your ability to make and eat foods. In recovery, there will be successes and there will be setbacks. Setbacks do tend to make us work a little harder in recovery and that’s okay.
Tips to help you feel connected
- When you feel like you are spiraling, remember that you are not alone. What can you do? Reach out for support! Contact us, call a crisis or support line (988), join a virtual eating disorder support group , see a doctor or mental health professional, or call a friend or family member. No matter how hard today feels, no matter how painful, remember this: You have access to the tools you need. Reach out.
- Stay up to date with your therapy, medical and dietitian appointments. This will be key in helping you stay connected and on the path to recovery.
- It’s very hard to get through recovery alone. Who can you go to when you need recovery support? Who can you text? Who can you call? Who can you see in person? Use your support team as often as you need to get through the tough moments that will continue to arise.
- Your support system should include individuals who are your “safe people.” Go ahead and write down a list of the people in your life who you feel safe with. Let this list remind you that you are not alone.
- Do you tend to isolate when times get tough? If so, you are far from alone. However, isolating yourself can increase feelings of self-loathing and shame. And isolating yourself might even lead to a relapse — which could make you feel even worse over time. Instead of withdrawing completely from everyone, try to keep in touch with a chosen few people daily. Make time to see them regularly, even if you choose to keep your visits short.
- Find community and connection by joining us at one of our free online eating disorder support groups here.
Tips to help you manage anxiety
- Facing your fears is hard! But it is a necessary process that takes us one step closer to achieving our dreams and thriving in recovery. In times of anxiety, can you step outside of yourself for a moment? Look around the room and refocus on the people around you. Reach out and connect with someone. When we shift the focus from fear to connection, we open ourselves up to joy and a deeper recovery.
- What are your go-to coping skills for anxiety? We recommend having some ideas lined up for moments you need them. Some examples:
- Calling or texting a supportive friend.
- Taking time to journal, meditate or enjoy a mindful walk.
- Whatever your personal recovery coping skills are, rely on them. Write them down. Memorize them. These will be your go-to problem solvers when you are struggling.
- Fact checking, a skill that comes from dialectical behavior therapy (DBT), can help you cope with anxiety. When an anxious thought arises, take a moment to clear your head.
- Identify the emotion. Ask yourself: what prompted this emotion?
- Look at the situation from another point of view.
- Ask yourself: is there a real threat? Is my anxiety really warranted?
Tips for social events and holidays
- If social events are hard for you in recovery, let someone know. Can you ask a trusted friend or relative to accompany you to parties or holiday gatherings? If they can’t go, ask if you can call or text them should you become anxious, upset or triggered.
- If you are going to a party and are not sure if you can stick to your meal plan, talk to your support team about creating an eating disorder relapse prevention plan to avoid being triggered or using eating disorder behaviors.
- As you become more aware of your emotions around food, holiday traditions and family dynamics, you may wonder how to get through holidays. Talk with your treatment team if you need help with the following:
- People commenting on your appearance or what you are eating (or not eating)
- Feeling tempted to stray from your meal plan
- Feeling self-conscious or anxious.
- Holidays can be hard, especially when you’re new to recovery. Take a moment to write down what you want your holidays to look like. How can your values guide your holiday season? Do you have any favorite holiday traditions? How does your recovery relate to each holiday? Own your power and redefine what holidays mean to you.
Tips to help you manage perfectionism
- Many who struggle with eating disorders like anorexia and bulimia also struggle with perfectionism. Remember: rigid rules and expectations only lead to more suffering, anxiety and shame.
- Life isn’t perfect. Don’t expect recovery to be. Recovery is being perfectly imperfect.
- In recovery we learn about the importance of flexibility. We learn how to let go of rigid expectations to find a world full of spontaneity, surprises and joy. If you tend toward being inflexible, try changing your daily routine or exploring new experiences (museums, hiking, social engagements, etc.)
Tips for self-care in recovery
- Acknowledge all your successes in recovery — even the small ones — by creating mini celebrations for yourself:
- Start a gratitude practice.
- Put your hands on your heart or give yourself a mini hug.
- Reward yourself with your favorite self-care.
- Remind yourself to breathe.
- If you talk to others in eating disorder recovery, the vast majority will tell you how hard recovery is. They will also tell you that you can do this. If you feel like you’re failing at recovery, please know that you are absolutely not failing. Life in recovery is hard! When you struggle, turn each situation around and ask yourself, “What do I need right now?” Give yourself a big dose of self-compassion and self-love and remind yourself that you can do this.
- Try using a mantra or repeating positive affirmations when needed: “I am right where I belong. It took all I’ve been through to get here. I am right where I need to be.”
- On hard days, it’s okay to take breaks. Make time for gentle movement, breathing exercises, body scans or other relaxation activities. Check in with yourself if you’re struggling; notice how you feel and determine what you need in that moment.
Mindfulness tips
- If you feel the urge to use eating disorder behaviors, take a pause. Can you allow those feelings and ideas to linger … without acting on them? Remind the eating disorder, “You can no longer bully me.” Meditation can help you strengthen your mindfulness muscles.
- You spent months or years numbing your pain by using eating disorder behaviors. As you make progress in recovery and difficult feelings start to surface, find healthier, more effective ways to cope with the pain: talk about what’s going on, journal or dance it out.
- Allow yourself to really feel your feelings — all of them. No, really! When we allow ourselves to feel our feelings without escaping, simply pausing and noticing, we get the opportunity to explore a new relationship with our feelings. Reach out to your therapist if this is hard for you.
- If you’re having a hard day, try urge surfing. This practice helps you ride the wave as you let the urge to engage in eating disorder behaviors pass. The goal of urge surfing is not to eliminate desires, urges or impulses. That task is impossible. The goal is to learn that not all desires, urges or impulses must be satisfied or responded to.
Tips to help you set boundaries
- If you find yourself saying "yes" too often — because you feel bad for saying "no" — know that it’s perfectly fine to set boundaries to protect yourself and your recovery. Setting boundaries can help to improve our self-esteem and increase joy as we start to prioritize activities in life that correspond to our highest values.
- If you think you’re saying “no” too much, or you are saying “no” because you just want to isolate, reach out to your therapist or a trusted friend to explore why. Discuss the difference between rest, self-care and isolating.
- Boundaries don’t ruin relationships. Boundaries help us preserve and maintain connections. This is because, with the right boundaries, both parties understand what the other needs. Both parties know how to keep the relationship healthy and harmonious. Instead of heading toward a rupture, with the right boundaries, relationships can strengthen and endure.
From treatment to the real world
When you enter an eating disorder treatment center, you’re given a safe, supportive place to heal. You’re nurtured by people who understand what you’re going through — professionals and peers. You learn how to talk openly about your feelings and struggles as you face challenges and learn new coping skills. You can rest when you need it. Whether you're in recovery for anorexia, bulimia, binge eating, or another eating disorder, treatment can feel like a cocoon … a place to safely recover. What a gift!
Inevitably, you must leave treatment and reenter the big, messy, unpredictable world. It is normal to feel overwhelmed by this transition, and to even resist it a little. But it is still a transition you must make. When you finish treatment, your world and day-to-day life are going to look and feel different.
Get matched with the support you need right now
Feel free to reach out to us if you need encouragement. We are here to help you maintain your recovery.
- Call 866-622-5914 now to speak with a compassionate, trained professional.
- Fill out this brief form to set up a free eating disorder screening.
Along with reaching out to us, we invite you to learn more about our alumni events and free online eating disorder support groups. As you create a life worth living, commit to recovery and know that we are right here to support you.
Thank you to our eating disorder recovery experts Eric Dorsa, Bonnie Brennan, Savannah Kerr, Robyn Cruze and so many others for contributing your wisdom and hearts to this piece.
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